Bacon ice cream should not exist

Bacon Ice Cream

Bacon ice cream. That’s a real thing. But it shouldn’t be. Let me explain why.

Today I was eating some ice cream. I thought to myself, There is no such thing as ‘enough ice cream.’  I immediately thought of bacon-flavored ice cream. Two of the best things on earth in one package. Bacon and ice cream. Could there be a better combination? Yes. There could definitely be a better combination.

You see, bacon is essentially the greatest food known to man. It is physically impossible to improve on bacon. It simply cannot be done. Ice cream is one of the greatest desserts known to man. It is nearly impossible to improve on ice cream. So why bother trying?

Consider this: if you eat ice cream and bacon separately, you will take twice as much time to consume two flavors that cannot be improved on. If you combine them, you aren’t really improving anything, since it is physically impossible to improve on the flavor of bacon. Combining it with ice cream does nothing but allow you to consume two delicious foods in half the time normally required.

Why would you deprive yourself of the time you could spend eating bacon and ice cream separately by combining the two and rushing through it? That’s just sloppy. And that’s why bacon ice cream should not exist.